Something To Look Forward To

Soon after Tyler's funeral, people started suggesting we take the kids on a trip. At first I couldn't even consider a vacation without Tyler. We always put vacations to the side because we needed the money elsewhere. That is on my list of regrets when it comes to things we didn't do with Tyler. We did start talking to the kids about getting away together when a friend offered us the use of his family's beach house. Everyone was correct; it was great to go somewhere with family.

We had already spoken with the kids about another vacation spot  and the seeds were planted. We asked the kids where we could go that we might enjoy without Tyler. The answer was instantaneous from all three. Walt Disney World. Dean and I already knew that this would undoubtedly be their response. Peyton ,Rebekah, Rachel and I have always called it our "Happy Place". We went five times before they changed schools. Dean tolerates it but Tyler hated it. He went on our first trip for a few days and our last trip for a few days and was not happy about it. It would be the perfect place to go because we could always pretend he was back home with his grandparents(we don't have to be realistic everyday). Should we spend that much money? Especially when I am trying to stay home with the children as long as possible? No, we should not. More important to me than money is the fact that I am not guaranteed tomorrow with my family. I don't have a huge amount of regrets about my short time with Tyler but rarely a day goes by that I don't think of the ones I do have. I do not plan to continue to make the same mistakes if I have a choice.

Therefore I am planning a Disney trip. We have decided to go during Thanksgiving. We will miss being with all of the family for that day but I believe it will be good for us to change things up a bit for our first holiday without Tyler. It was one of his favorites; anyone who knew Tyler knows that he loved a day that revolved around food. We do have family and friends joining us. Hopefully my mom will be able to join us. My sister, Heather, and her family are going. Also, my friend, Ginger, and her two boys. We will all share a house just outside the parks, which saves us a ton of money.

I am apprehensive about some aspects of the trip but am happy that the kids talk about it and are genuinely excited. Everyone needs something in life to look forward to.